It is amazing how in the course of a single day I can want to put my children up for sale on Ebay and then later on that same day want to weep with happiness at something so simple my heart breaks. Earlier today I came downstairs from putting Sullivan down for his morning nap and discovered Teague had climbed up on to the counter (no suprise there) and dumped the salt all over the counter and floor. A definite dip on the 'how much do I love being a mom scale'. Then just a few hours later we were out running errands. I let them take their 'spend' money to the dollar store hoping that whatever the bought would distract them enough to let me get the two real errands out of the way without incident (i.e. yelling at my kids in public). Anyway they each picked out their things and as we were walking to the car they were both so happy with their purchases they ran off together screaming in excitement. Maybe it is the photographer in me that sees these moments as something so precious they should be captured so that we don't forget them. I wished I had had my camera with me to capture their joy as they ran to the car to open up their treasures. Their coats blowing out behind them as they ran, the sun lighting them just right. I love watching my boys become friends and so perhaps that is why I got choked up. They were so clearly enjoying each other and sharing in a childhood memory. Then on the way home from the last errand I had to pull the car over and refrain killing Teague when he had unbuckled himself because he coat was bothering him. Of course. Another dip on the scale. At least it is almost naptime.
Don't get the wrong idea though. It isn't just Teague who drives me crazy but he is just that age right now. Beckett used to do things too but has grown out of it and just does other things that drive me crazy but aren't as messy. I'm sure right as Teague outgrows it Sullivan will be ready to go with all new ways to torture his mother.
So these are the ups and downs of motherhood that drive me to the edge of sanity sometimes. One moment they are throwing fits over something seemingly ridiculous and the next moment after you have tucked them into bed (finally) as you walk out of the room they say 'mommy you're pretty'. Awwww, I guess they will live to see another day.
